Raising Boys

I just finished reading this really interesting book, Raising Boys by Steven Biddulph.

You can ask any person who has had experience with little children about the differences between boys and girls. They are like whole different species. And since I'm a girl and have not, nor will ever be a boy, I figured some insight into 3 of the 4 children I'm raising would be good.

The thing I liked best about the book was his explanation of the 3 stages of boyhood:
1. From Birth to 6. During this stage a boy needs love and security which comes primarily from mom.
2. From 6 to 14. During this stage a boy needs to build competence and skills while also developing kindness and playfulness. These skills are primarily learned from dad.
3. From 14 to adult. During this stage a boy needs to learn more skills, responsibility and self-respect. This is primarily done through male mentors and role models with the parents helping to guide the boy toward the right people.

I guess I hadn't thought about it much but it all rang true. It fits where a boy naturally drifts at those ages. And it immediately made me grateful for the YM and scouting program that my boy's will be a part of. They will have those male role models to teach and guide them...cause let's all be honest here...when you are a teenager, your parents will tell you something and it goes in one ear and out the other. But when a respected adult tells you the exact same thing you listen and realize the wisdom.

Overall, a great little book for those of you with boys. It was written in an informative, yet entertaining matter. I didn't agree with some of the points that were trying to be made (especially the section on masturbation/pornography...but it let to an interesting discussion with my husband about dealing with boy's sexual urges) but it has some great ideas to glean from.

I guess I'm just worried about how my kids will turn out. I was reading in the BOM yesterday about Lehi's vision where Laman and Lemuel didn't take the fruit and Lehi knew he wouldn't be able to be with them for the eternities and it made me sad for him. The thought of not being with my children forever shakes me to the core. It makes me want to take away their free agency and make their decision for them. But I realize that isn't possible and even if it was, it wouldn't do them any good.

I've realized that I just need to prepare them as well as I can and hope they will choose the right (or CTR). But if they don't, just pray REALLY hard and hope they will return again to the fullness of the gospel. Sorry for the bit of a downer blog....food for thought I guess.